Hollywood Sucks 1996

So welcome to Hollywood Sucks. To me, 1995 is the year when film starts taking an insane downturn towards being horrible.
Now now, I know. Some of you are crying foul. But by the end of this series I think I'll have made my case. Each week I'll be rolling a D10 and a D4 and adding together the FACE VALUE together to the year 1994. This will result in what year I am talking about.

So for this installment, I hit 0 and 2, thus the year 1996.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Movies_in_1996


The top film that year? Independence day. Oh boy. and it made...306 Million dollars!? What the hell is this? If you've seen this movie, you know that as a Roland Emerich this movie is big on the epic, small on the characterization and you know, plot.
Oh kay, that was harsh. It does have a plot. Its just so absurdly simple that I wrote better material that year, and I was EIGHT! I will admit, there are a few cool visual elements, I admit it. I've watched it several times. but it doesn't make it a good movie not in the least.

Alright, what about number two that year? ...Twister?! That piece of shit movie about the estranged couple that chases and tornado of almost unprecedented size? Do I really need to explain how shitty this movie was? No? Good cause that's as much as I was going to.

So what about number three...Boring Impossible...I mean Mission Impossible. Four? Jerry Maguire. This isn't a good movie.
Five. Ransom. Mel fucking Gibson.
Six...wait what? There's actually a good movie on this list? Holy shit! That is 101 Dalmatians. Yes the puppy Disney movie. but the live action one, you know with Glenn Close and Hugh Laurie. Oh yeah, rematch it. Awesome.

Lets keep going.
Seven The Rock. As an action movie this is fun, but like Highlander, Sean Connery does not instantly make your movie a good movie(it can however make it a great cult classic, but that's a different category).

8. Nutty Professor. Eddie. Murphy.
9.Birdcage. Hey wait a second. This is a half decent comedy that's actually funny and happens to be respectful of its subject, people of homosexuality. I would like to point out that it is based on a great play, La Cage, not the film of the same name.

10. A time to kill. Long, boring and insanely predictable.

So many the movie that took home the most Oscars that year was...oh...lets not talk about that one.

so IN CONCLUSION 1996 sucked pretty badly or rather, America chose to see the really bad parts of 1996. Why? Because there were good parts, here's the highlights of 1996.





Dragonheart(its a fun movie)
Fargo
Fly Away Home
From Dusk till Dawn
Gamera 2:Attack of Legion(Kaiju!)
James and the Giant Peach(Brilliant)
Mars Attacks!
Muppet Treasure Islands
My Fellow Americans
Star Trek:First Contact
Trainspotting
Scream(of this list, scream was the highest at 13th that year)


So 12 movies in the year were worth watching. Maybe 14. But its a very small amount. Ugh.

So how about the bottom of the barrel?


Spy Hard
SpaceJam(only good with nostalgia glasses)
Romeo+Juliet
Ransom
Kazaam
Jingle All the way
Joe's appartment
Jack
Homeward bound 2
Flipper
Eraser
Dunston Checks in
D3
Down Periscope
The craft
Barb wire


Oh and for those wondering, and who think I'm harsh and crazy, The rotten tomatoes scores:


Independence day 62 percent
Twister 55%
Mission: Impossible 56%
Jerry Maguire ...84%
Ransom 70%
101 Dalmatians 40%
The Rock 65%
The Nutty Professor 65%
The Birdcage 75%
A Time to Kill 69%